Dear Diary,
It was a very chilly and dark night, overcast without a single star in the sky. The kind of night where the air feels heavy and quiet, as if the world is waiting for something. Mini stretched lazily in the doorway as Sister Mary Claire and I wrapped up in our coats, waiting for Robert to arrive. He had called earlier to offer us a ride to church, which was a kindness, as the night seemed colder than it truly was. Mini wagged her little bottom, watching us closely.
We had gone early to St. Mary’s so we could read our meditation before Mass. Tonight’s reflection was on Jesus exhorting His apostles to have confidence in God’s providence. As we sat in the quiet of the church, Sister Mary Claire explained how the apostles had been sent out without purse or shoes, yet they had lacked nothing. “Jesus reminded them of the past to strengthen them for the trials ahead,” she said gently. “Just as we must remind ourselves of how God has always provided for us.”
I thought of John Hathaway’s cave, his old books, and the belongings he had left behind. Everything there seemed to fit so well into my own spiritual life, as if it had all been waiting for me to discover it. The books, the simple wooden desk, the carefully carved walnut door—everything spoke of a life deeply rooted in faith and trust in God’s providence. Just as the apostles had trusted Jesus to provide for them, John Hathaway had trusted God in his own quiet way, leaving behind not just things, but a life lived in faith.
Sister Mary Claire must have seen my thoughts on my face. “You see, Kathy,” she said, “our Lord never asks us to walk blindly. He leaves us signs, reminders of His care, so that we may walk forward in confidence.”
By the time Mass began, the church was filled with the soft glow of candlelight. The stained-glass windows were dark against the night outside, but inside, there was warmth and peace. I knelt and prayed for a heart full of confidence, that I might trust in God as the apostles had, as John Hathaway had.
After Mass, Robert was waiting for us, his truck warm against the night’s chill. Mini greeted us at the door when we arrived home, stretching and shaking herself before following me into the bedroom. As I knelt to say my prayers I whispered:
“O Lord, in Thee I place my trust. As You have provided for the apostles, so have You provided for me. Let me never forget Your goodness, nor let my heart falter in confidence. In every trial, in every uncertainty, may I turn to You, my refuge and my strength. My Father, I place all my trust in Thee. Amen.”
Good night dear diary,
Love Kathy
No comments:
Post a Comment